Itchy Thursday

Today was a pretty typical day. I actually felt like I was being slightly effective at my job today, so I guess that was a plus! Today was National Parent Involvement Day... and the only thing about that that interested me was that Charlie's mom came up for it. Which meant Charlie spent the morning with her, and not with me! Hmm, perhaps this is why I felt effective? I even had some quality one on one time with Kevin this morning... pulling him out of his centers activity to do a quick reading test with him. Now, he's not at the point of being able to read on his own, but the test was measuring how much information he was actually absorbing when I read to him. I had tried to do this test with him a month ago, to no avail. He would look at the ceiling, talk about his cool pencil, play with the fifty cents his mom had given him for ice cream... anything but pay attention to me. Today, the little bugger not only paid attention, but he got every answer right, which just goes to show how smart he is! A kid who tries to manipulate every situation like Kevin does is clearly very intelligent. ADHD sure, but it is so much further than that. The kid just likes to do whatever he wants to do, and piss on the rest!

Anyhow, today there was a staff meeting after school. Because, yes, after a grueling day with my class, I most definitely wanted to stay after school for an extra hour! Anyhow, I was sitting, absentmindedly scratching my head during this meeting. Well, lol damn it, I'm half black... yes, in general, you will see black women scratch their scalps. Why? Because our scalps are super dry... that's why we add oil to our hair. Anyhow, this crazy teacher (not to be confused with the crazy in the next door unit), leans over and whispers "Tamara, is your hair itchy?"

Now, I'm thinking she's going to recommend some nice moisturizing shampoo to me. I was a little confused, and said "Um, kind of?" I mean, how else was I supposed to respond to that?

Now she leans over to me again, and whispers, "I thought I saw a couple of spots in your hair near your ponytail, you might want to let the secretary do a head check for you... I'm just telling you this because I love you so much!"

Then the bitch proceeds to sit about 10 feet away from me. Yes I just called her a bitch. What the hell, are you seriously implying that I have head lice? Damn can't a person have dandruff in peace? Besides, I mean, honestly, it is incredibly hard for a black person to get head lice. Between the lice not being able to adhere well to the texture of our hair, to the hair oils we use, plus the sizzling hot flat iron I use... yeah, the likelihood of head lice is slim to none.

So now I just sat pissed off in the meeting, and slightly freaking out that I might have lice. I mean, I have tickets for Harry Potter tomorrow at the IMAX! I could not possibly miss that because of lice, could I?

After the meeting, I wandered into the office, where the principal strikes up a friendly conversation with me. She noticed I looked odd, so she asked me what was going on. I asked her if the secretary was still around, and she said "Yes... I know where she is... but why do you need her so late?"

I then went on to explain what old crazy said to me, and she laughed and said "Oh good lord! Seriously Tamara, I don't even think it would be possible with your hair texture! You don't need the secretary, I can do a head check! My daughter once got lice from her horse riding camp... do you know they all shared helmets? Here, take your ponytail down and let me see!"

So yes, at about 5 pm today I was sitting in the principal's chair while she was looking through my hair for head lice, laughing the entire time. She asked me if I had any kids in my room who had "itchies in their hair," and she laughed hysterically when I said "Well, I mean, I've only got one white kid...."

Thankfully I know her rather well, and she got a good laugh out of my whole freak out moment.

And damn it, let me itch my head in peace!